No One Prepares You for Marriage, Childbirth Broke Me Emotionally, Mentally, and Sexually

 

No one prepares you for marriage.

They show you the wedding gowns, the photo shoots, the fancy rings, but no one tells you how one small thing, something as little as a baby’s cry, can make you feel like you’re losing your mind.

After giving birth to our firstborn, I spiraled. I don’t know whether it was postpartum depression or what, but I was angry, irritated, and constantly on the edge.

I hated how I looked. My body felt foreign. I had stretch marks I never imagined. My breasts were sore, my tummy loose, and don’t even get me started on the baby weight. I’d stare at myself in the mirror and cry.

Meanwhile, my husband’s life stayed the same.

He still went to work, dressed up nicely, hit the gym, even laughed on phone with his friends. He could nap whenever he wanted, while I couldn’t even shower without the baby crying.

I started resenting him.
I’d watch him sleep peacefully at night, snoring, while I was awake, rocking a screaming baby with tears streaming down my face. I felt invisible.

He tried helping, yes, but I always thought “you’re not doing enough!”
I snapped at him for the smallest things. He’d buy the wrong diaper brand and I’d lose it.
I thought he didn’t understand me.
Maybe he didn’t.
But honestly, I didn’t understand myself either. to read more click here