Dr. John Mining Warns Singles Against “Dangerous Weddings,” Calls for Purposeful Marriages

Renowned marriage counsellor and relationship teacher Dr. John Mining has cautioned singles against focusing on extravagant wedding ceremonies at the expense of preparing for marriage, warning that such priorities are contributing to rising marital breakdowns.

In a recent write-up titled “9 Dangerous Weddings Singles Must Not Do,” Dr. Mining shared a sobering account of a couple whose marriage collapsed barely six months after a lavish wedding that drew admiration from guests and onlookers.

“Everything sparkled that day — the hall, the lights, the outfits,” Dr. Mining wrote. “But beneath the glamour was a silent truth: they were not ready for marriage.”

According to Dr. Mining, many singles invest heavily in planning the wedding day while neglecting the emotional, spiritual, and practical foundations required to sustain a lifelong union.

Nine Risky Wedding Mindsets

In his message, Dr. Mining outlined nine wedding approaches he described as dangerous to marital stability. These include competition-driven weddings aimed at outshining others, loan-funded ceremonies that leave couples in debt, and rushed marriages between partners who barely know each other.

He also warned against family-pressure weddings, where individuals marry to satisfy relatives or religious leaders, and pregnancy-forced unions, which he said are often built on guilt rather than genuine commitment.

“Marriage entered through pressure or fear often struggles with resentment and mistrust,” Dr. Mining noted.

Other concerns raised include show-off weddings centered on social media validation, unions planned without prayer or spiritual guidance, marriages entered despite unresolved conflicts, and weddings lacking clear discussions around purpose, values, finances, and long-term goals.

“Marriage Is Not Fixed by a Ceremony”

Dr. Mining emphasized that marriage does not automatically resolve personal or relational issues. Instead, he said, unresolved problems tend to intensify after the wedding.

“Marriage does not fix problems; it amplifies them,” he stated, urging couples to seek premarital counselling and honest conversations before walking down the aisle.

A Call for Wisdom and Intentionality

Concluding his message, Dr. Mining encouraged singles to resist societal pressure and prioritize peace, preparation, and purpose over spectacle.

“A successful marriage is not about a perfect wedding — it is about a prepared heart,” he said. “It is better to have a small wedding with great understanding than a big wedding with lifelong confusion.”

The message has since resonated widely, sparking conversations among faith communities and relationship circles about the need to redefine success in marriage — not by the beauty of the ceremony, but by the strength of the union that follows.